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Bruce Scott
COUSIN EARL THINKS SCOTT IS 1/2
LOADING THE DISHWASHER IRISH AND SCOTTISH
MEANS GETTING HE GETS DRUNK
HIS WIFE DRUNK AND WEARS A DRESS
POLITICS IN AMERICA THE US ARMY
PROOF THAT THE FACTS OUR OFFICERS ARE
WHILE INTERESTING PROUD OF THEIR PRIVATES
ARE IRRELEVANT
COUSIN EARL IS COUSIN EARLS' GIRLFRIEND
DRESSED TO KILL TAKES HIS BREATH AWAY
TURBAN, BEARD BECAUSE HE HAS TO
& EXPLODING SANDALS INFLATE HER
SCOTT WILL DO ANYTHING COUSIN EARL OPENED
SHORT OF DIET AND EXERCISE A SELF SERVICE
TO LOSE WEIGHT MASSAGE PARLOR
HOLE FOUND IN STRIP CLUB WALL THEY CALL IT PMS BECAUSE
POLICE ARE MAD COW DISEASE
LOOKING INTO IT WAS ALREADY TAKEN
SOME PEOPLE AGE LIKE WINE A WATCHED CLOCK
BRUCE AGES LIKE MILK NEVER BOILS
LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER NO SOCIETY HAS EVER
THAN SOUND TAXED ITSELF
THATS WHY SOME PEOPLE INTO PROSPERITY
APPEAR BRIGHT UNTIL THANKS GOVERNOR
YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK
BRUCE CHECKED HIS FAMILY TREE PETER ANGELOS SAID
AND FOUND OUT IF THE ORIOLES PLAY
HE IS THE SAP WELL THIS YEAR,
WE MIGHT GET
ILLITERATE? A PROFESSIONAL TEAM
WRITE US FOR HELP
TOILET SEAT STOLEN FROM WE SELL PROPANE
POLICE STATION OUR GAS IS
COPS HAVE IN THE REAR
NOTHING TO GO ON
TACO BELL NOW HAS A
HEY MARYLAND LEGISLATORS VEGETARIAN MENU
YOU'RE PROCTOLOGIST FOR THOSE WHO DON'T WANT
CALLED MEAT BUT STILL WANT
THEY FOUND YOUR HEAD DIARRHEA
WOMAN IS NOT MANS
DON'T BE SEXIST NATURAL ENEMY
BROADS HATE THAT HER LAWYER IS
SCOTT ORDERED COUSIN EARL WILL NEVER
A PITCHER FULL OF BEER TAKE A LAXATIVE AND
AND THEY BROUGHT HIM A SLEEPING PILL ON THE
SIDNEY PONSON SAME NIGHT AGAIN
BRUCE WOULD RATHER GO SCOTT'S FAVORITE DRINK IS
HUNTING WITH DICK CHENEY MILK OF MAGNESIA AND VODKA
THAN PAY HIS TAXES IT'S CALLED A PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER
BRUCE'S DESK IS REALLY SCOTT AND BRUCE
JUST A TRASH CAN GOD MADE THEM BROTHERS
WITH DRAWERS PROZAC MADE THEM
FRIENDS
THE WORD POLITICS USE YOUR VOWELS
COMES FROM POLI, MEANING EVERYDAY
MANY AND TICS MEANING OR YOU WILL GET
BLOODSUCKING CREATURES CONSONATED
DURING THE POWER OUTAGE EVER NOTICE THAT IF YOU
BRUCE WAS STUCK REARRANGE THE LETTERS OF
ON AN ESCALATOR FOR THE LETTERS OF MOTHER IN LAW
OVER 2 HOURS IT SPELLS
WOMAN HITLER
GETTING OLDER MEANS THAT
INSTEAD OF GOING TO INDIVIDUALISTS UNITE
A HIP NEW JOINT,
YOUR GETTING A NEW HIP JOINT
BRUCE 1973- KEG
BRUCE 2006- EKG